hi, i'm meghan

yeah, so, said the voice from behind the counter.

well, i am here to teach the course on centering.

oh, yeah, right, well put all your belongings in the tray
wallet, loose change, your bag
we'll search it and then you can go through the detector
and the woman officer will pat you down.

oh, okay,
i didn't realize

yes, it's standard procedure now
everybody gets searched
no exceptions.

oh, okay.

meghan slipped off her kit gloves
and put her small bag in the
rectangular plastic box

she unbuttoned her jacket and put it
on the counter.

the officer felt the sleeves
turned the pockets inside out
and then felt the back of the jacket

everything must have been okay
because he laid it on the table and
then said,
okay, you can go through the detector now.

meghan took a breath
and pushed her shoulders back
and lifted her chin slightly
and walked through the detector that looked like
a door frame.

the woman office met her and motioned her to the side

lift your arms
and hold them out straight

she did as she was told
and the young woman officer felt her arms

tapped the front of her and
said excuse me, and tapped her stomach
turn around she said
and meghan did as she was told

her buttocks were patted and her legs hastily
touched

she's okay, pat,

all right you can get your stuff now
the policewoman said.

meghan retrieved her personal items
and was directed to follow the red arrows
on the floor to the next part of the building
where she would be told what to do next.

in all it took her 45 minutes to get processed
and find herself in the classroom where she would
ultimately teach centering to a group of inmates.

she had wanted to do this for a long time
but didn't feel that her own centering was going anywhere
sometimes she still didn't, but she kept doing it
nonetheless.

maybe someone in this group wold find solace and comfort
from the practice
she could only hope that they would.

the jail

meghan woke up and with her eyes still
shut her right hand found the alarm clock
on the left side of her bed and her hands
found the snooze button and she pushed it.

ten more minutes
and then she would be up

her mind was fuzzy but through the haze of
last night's sleep she knew today was different.

she shook her mind for a second
what was different

oh, yes, today was her first day teaching at the jail.

she couldn't believe they had finally let her in
she was going to show them a new path
one which she had travelled for ove 25 years
and now she got to give back.

she remembered what cynthia had said that
one weekendi n june
if you can start over here doing what you'll be
doing when you pass why not?

yes, why not indeed thought meghan.

centering prayer took her on her own journey.

her journey was different than the others
they would have to find their own path
their own truth

if she could help in some small way
why not.

passions

centering prayer
writing
drawing
sculpting
knitting

vision

what do i want to be
i have 25 years left
do i spend it in school
do i spend it learning
i don't know what to do.

i want to be a successful writer
but at what price though

a beginning
a middle
and an end.

what is my passion?

i don't know.

i am empowered when other people
find their power.

i am least empowered when i have no control over my life.

what do i want most

to give others a chance
their chance

how do i do that?

i have to take cp to the next level.

i sat in silence
meditating
contemplating
i heard a bird singing
i became the air around it.

today is tuesday

welcome to my new blog